SUMMER

In England it rains for nine months of the year, for the remaining three months it has either just stopped raining or it is just going to start raining. And then all of a sudden The Sun shines and the whole country goes crazy.

We live wrapped up in a bubble, the windows and doors shut, the only time we breath fresh air is the dash from the house to the car and from the car to work or the shops. As soon as The Sun shines the windows and doors are flung open, and what do we get? The sounds of Summer!


Barking dogs, loud music through open doors and windows, bloody lawn mowers buzzing away at all time of day and night. Thirtysomethings having designer BBQ's, dressed in their designer long shorts, showing off their designer Benidorm tans, with The Sun flashing off their designer gold necklaces and ear studs, wafting their designer BBQ smoke through my open door and windows and playing their designer loud music.

The kids start playing out in the street, football, skipping, just generally running about in the soon to be gone sunshine, they make a noise but its a nice noise, apart from The Screamers, that's awful.The plonker at number 15 who spends all day cleaning and polishing his car and listening to The Rolling Stones Greatest Hits(a one-sided single) not through earphones connected to a Walkman but from a 1960's portable tape deck so we all can hear it.


Alarms! What a waste of time, does anybody take any notice of them? Car alarms going off every twenty minutes, the alarm at the restaurant up the street that sets off at 4-30am, no-one lives above the shop so it's the next morning before it's turned off.

Mrs Next Door, whom you never see all year round, going out to her washing machine in the garage twenty times a day, she slams the kitchen door, goes into the garage and slams that door, comes out of the garage and slams the door and then slams the door when she goes back into the kitchen.

Wish it would rain then I could close my door and windows.